And So It Begins.

In a world where money can’t buy love and kittens have dominated the Internet, there is an aspiring writer who questions life’s randomness while attempting to hold onto logic. As for the sanity, well, that’s been lost. But who needs it anyway?

Greetings everyone, my name is Vannilla Fudge.


As you can see in my brief bio, it says that I’m a wannabe mermaid.

For those who don’t know what a mermaid is, it’s a half human half fish hybrid of beauty.  Most of you are probably familiar with these fantastic creatures from movies like The Little Mermaid, Splash, Aquamarine, and Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides. There are also different types of mermaids portrayed in myths based on various cultures. For example, a mermaid in Japan is called a ningyo and is depicted as a half fish, half human.  Their tears can transform into pearls which have a high, magical value and their blood can be used to cure every sickness.

To the left, your typical mermaid. To the right, what they consider a normal mermaid.

Another type of mermaid, the melusine, was often found in medieval bestiaries. It was always depicted as a twin tailed mermaid; sound familiar?

Starbucks: The coffee of lords and ladies who aren't afraid to tax their peasants to purchase it!

That’s right. Starbucks was around during the times of knights, dragons, and princesses.

My love of these mythological sea creatures started when I was a child. The mere idea of being able to see a completely new and different world beneath the waves fascinated me. Even more so, viewing that world without having to worry about running out of air meant I could explore it as long as I liked. I always wanted to see what it was like to endlessly adventure under the bodies of water and see a world I was not familiar with. However, there are other reasons as to why I’d love to be a normal mermaid. Here are my top five reasons:

    1)      You get to travel – as a mermaid you have the proper bodily functions to breathe underwater for extended periods of time, swim gracefully, and look fantastic doing it all. Now remember that all our worldly oceans are connected. Our seas are also joined to the oceans but are smaller in comparison. Each bear a different name and are different from the rest based on their creatures, depths, reefs, and many other qualities. For example, the Caribbean Sea possesses an amazing sight for divers, tourists, and others: The Cancun Underwater Museum.

Oh God, the weeping angels are everywhere!

In November 2009, construction was started on this project with the goal of promoting coral reef growth, the development of marine life, and conservation. By using neutral clay to sculpt over four hundred pieces of art, Jason deCaires Taylor was not only able to achieve his goals but feature some amazing sculpture skills as well. The Cancun Underwater Museum lies beneath the coasts of Cancun and Isle de Mujeres.  The Mediterranean Sea also shares something like this where the ruins of Cleopatra’s palace will also become an underwater museum. As a mermaid, you don’t need to pay the fee for renting scuba gear, airfare, a hotel room, possibly a rental car, or anything of the sort. You can just swim right into these aquatic museums (and other places) without travel expenses.

   2)      You get to see what land lovers haven’t– there are fathoms beneath the waves that humans have not explored yet. As a mermaid, you get to dive down deep into the undiscovered ocean. You get to see the wonders that have not met human eyes yet. You experience the sudden temperature changes, the nature of the different creatures and their habitats, the undiscovered artifacts of extinct cultures, and so much more.  You’re the first to see something new and amazing and explore it to your heart’s content.

   3)      Sunken ships and buried treasure – the idea encountering an abandoned, antique ship is thrilling. You question how long it was there, what purpose did it serve, how did it sink, when that shark get here? The excitement and curiosity builds greatly as you travel through the parts of the ship and examine each room. Down every corridor and through every cabin, the pieces fall into place. You begin to understand what happened, who was aboard, what type of people they were, and hopefully, escape that shark.  Sometimes, while exploring a ship or even on the ocean floor, you’ll even find buried treasure. While it’s not easy to find, it sure is a glorious surprise when you stumble upon it.  Gold coins, chalices, and gems? Yes, please!

   4)      Killing people with your voice – mermaids were also called sirens that lured sailors to their death by singing. The crewmen and captain would get so distracted by their beautiful voices that they would fail to control their ship and crash it into the nearest rock. This could come in handy if you want to destroy a ship with poachers, kidnappers, or any villain on board. Or you know, if your ex is on it, and you want to get some sweet revenge. Your soulful voice could probably also work on fellow jet skiers, motor boat captains, and many other aquatic crafts. However, I highly doubt it would work on a submarine.

    5)      You get to be a legend – there are speculations that mermaids may or may not exist in the past and/or present. There are even Discovery Channel programs like Mermaids New Evidence 2013 and Mermaids: The Body Found which explore the possible existence of mermaids. There are also people out there who believe that mermaids are real; some even have theories and evidence to support their claim. Others just like to believe. But for those who don’t believe in mermaids, you can tell them to kiss your fins because as a mermaid, you exist! You’re a myth throughout the world and its numerous oceans. When people see you it’s like seeing a celebrity  - exclusive and amazing. The only thing you have to worry about is people attempting to capture you and using you.